Sans Kids

Blog much?

2009-12-19T23:11:00.000-06:00

Apparently, I don't.

:0P

Since I can't think of anything else to post, might as well throw up a picture...

2009-11-04T16:29:00.017-06:00

Music -- it's Personal.

2009-10-25T13:16:00.003-05:00

(listen to the first three and a half minutes)

This semester I am taking an Intro to Music Literature class (just a fancy name for music history) and for the class I have to write two papers -- one critiquing an audio recording of a classical piece and another critiquing an actual concert performance. The audio recording critique is the first due, due this coming Tuesday in fact, and ever since I chose the piece I would be critiquing I have wanted to share it with anybody who'd listen.

I have always loved the cello as an instrument, there just isn't any other that can capture the range of emotion and feeling it is capable of producing, and in Vivaldi's Concerto for Two Cellos in G minor I think Vivaldi has showcased the cello's abilities brilliantly. For my critique I am focusing on the first movement of this piece and there are hardly any words to adequately express the emotion the music evokes in me -- it's just so beautiful. So beautiful, in fact, that it literally brings a tear to my eye and a chill to my bones.

The frustrating thing is, I know that it probably won't effect anyone else the same way. But then, I guess that's what's so great about music -- it's personal.

Going Green

2009-10-20T13:48:00.006-05:00

No, this post has nothing to do with saving the planet, recycling or buying a hybrid (though that might be nice because, really, who wouldn't want to save money on gas?). No, it's just a public statement that I have officially changed my favorite color. This change actually happened months ago, sometime before I started this blog, but I thought it was about time to post the announcement to the world wide web and thus make it official. So, here we go...

My favorite color used to be blue, but now it's green. And, just like with blue, I find myself tending towards the darker shades of the color.

I have no idea what spurred on the change, but I've been doing a lot of growing up in the past two years and I imagine it has something to do with that. A lot of things have changed since I was a kid, why shouldn't favorite color be one of them? Seems a little trivial, I know, but anyone who knows me knows how obsessed I was with the color blue, so I kinda see it as one small change that is indicative of a much bigger, and much more significant one.

And on that note, you may have noticed I've changed the way things look around here. I haven't been posting much, just haven't been able to think of anything to write, so I thought revamping the look of the blog might be cause for some inspiration. Don't be surprised if you see it change another time or two -- and don't be surprised when all of those changes include some green. ;0)

They have closed their eyes...

2009-10-16T15:22:00.007-05:00

"In their case the prophecy of Isaiah is being fulfilled, which says, 'You will keep on hearing, but will not understand; you will keep on seeing, but will not perceive; for the heart of this people has become dull, with their ears they scarcely hear, and THEY have closed their eyes, otherwise they would see with their eyes, hear with their ears, and understand with their heart and return, and I would heal them.'"
-- Matthew 13:14-15

"Then the word of the Lord came to me, saying, 'Son of man, you live in the midst of the rebellious house, who have eyes to see but do not see, ears to hear but do not hear; for they are a rebellious house.'"
-- Ezekiel 12:1-2

I feel like weeping.

What does it mean to worship?

2009-08-09T06:12:00.006-05:00

About a month ago I started helping out with the worship at my church. I have done this before, and even led the worship at my old college bible study for a time, but it hit me the other day that I don't really know what the purpose is for worship or what it even means to worship. Since that realization I've been asking God to show me what that purpose is and, though I have yet to experience any deep revelation on the subject, the Lord has used this time of searching to show me a few things. Namely, He's helped me to understand the message behind some of the songs I sing, or rather, He's used the songs to open up the deep riches of His word to me. I'd like to share what I can of what He's shown (and showing) me during this time.

First, Psalm 23.

This is a song I have always loved and enjoyed singing because, whether or not I really understood what it meant, it's Scripture so it means something. Recently, I was singing this song alone in my room and the Spirit hit me with some of that meaning. It came when I got to the part that says "surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life." In the back of my mind I've always thought this meant that God will give me goodness and bring mercy into my life, and while this is true, God is good and merciful to me, I don't think that alone is what God is really saying with this psalm. The deeper meaning is that I will give goodness and I will bring mercy into the lives of other people; that goodness and mercy is the fruit that will follow me as I am led by the Holy Spirit.

Here are a few verses that go into this understanding:

"And He said to him, ' "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind." This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.' "
-- Matthew 22:37-40

"If you love Me, you will keep My commandments."
-- John 14:15

"My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full."
-- John 15:8-11

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law."
-- Galatians 5:22, 23

"What use is it, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but he has no works? Can that faith save him? If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, 'Go in peace, be warmed and filled,' and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that?"
-- James 2:14-16

"So faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ."
-- Romans 10:17

"He guides me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake."
-- Psalm 23:3

"You have anointed my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."
-- Psalm 23:5, 6

So, if I love God, I will love my neighbor as myself. If I love God, I will keep His commandments. If I keep His commandments, I will abide in His love and when I abide in His love I will bear much fruit, prove myself to be Christ's disciple and glorify the Father. The fruit that I will bear is the fruit of the Spirit. That fruit is the work of my faith, the faith that comes from hearing the Spirit speak and move on the word of Christ. These are the paths of righteousness He guides me in and it is on the path of righteousness that I am anointed with oil. That oil, the Holy Spirit, overflows into my life and goodness and lovingkindness (the fruit) is borne out into the lives of those around me.

This has to be a part of what it means worship.

Tis So Sweet

2009-08-09T03:48:00.003-05:00

It's 3:45am, I've been awake since 10am yesterday morning, and I don't want to sleep. My heart is just too full -- full of God, full of His Word, His Spirit, His love... Everything. So much is going on right now inside my heart and head, so much I would love to share, but there just aren't words. None but these -- Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus, just to take Him at His word.

Chromey Goodness

2009-07-29T13:35:00.003-05:00

Not that anyone cares... But I just switched my internet browsing to Google Chrome -- and it's the bomb.

I could go into detail about why I like it and write this whole long review, but let's face it -- I just don't have the time nor the inclination. Just know that it's the bomb and you should try it.

Quite the riveting post to write after not posting for over a month, no?

World's Strongest Man

2009-06-10T00:56:00.002-05:00

I totally just felt like the World's Strongest Man carrying in that last load of groceries, except for, you know, instead of carrying a car or pulling a 44 ton airplane, I was carrying 6 things of apple juice, 4 bottles of salad dressing, 3 boxes of storage baggies, 2 boxes of Hot Pockets, 2 boxes of Tyson chicken patties and 1 jar of Peter Pan peanut butter.

That, and I'm a woman.

Lesson #527

2009-06-07T16:59:00.005-05:00

This is a lesson on the importance of not being in a hurry.

So, I was at Wal-Mart picking up groceries, formula, the Sunday paper, etc., when I made a complete and utter fool out of myself. I had gone through the self-checkout line once and taken everything out to the car when I decided it would be worth the money to go ahead and buy another Sunday paper. I go back in, grab the paper and briskly walk back to the self-checkout line.

As I'm walking up I see a lady at the front register scan an item and a few seconds later move on. I followed her as she was heading towards the door, stepped up to that back register and quickly scanned my paper. It was then I realized my mistake. The lady was still standing there. The look she was giving me was one of surprise and disgust and I immediately turned beet red. Apparently, she wasn't heading for the door at all, she was just heading to that back register because the front one wasn't working. I felt horrible, apologized profusely and offered to pay for her water bottle. She laughed, told me not to worry about it, and I left a few minutes later feeling like a total idiot.

Shopping -- fail.

The Love of God

2009-06-04T10:15:00.006-05:00

The love of God is amazing. So gentle. So kind. So wise. So powerful.

I was overwhelmed and struck with a sense of awe this morning when listening to some teaching on 1 Samuel 25 -- the story of David, Nabal and Abigail. I felt the Spirit when I read verses 32 and 33: "Then David spoke to Abigail, 'Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me, and blessed be your discernment, and blessed be you, who have kept me this day from bloodshed and from avenging myself by my own hand.'". Seems like a simple enough statement when read alone, but in context... Wow. The love of God hit me. And it was strong. God sent Abigail to David to keep him from evil and from bloodshed without cause. Sent her - which is to say - God was there, speaking to David through her.

*sigh* It's hard to describe. We think, "Of course God would do that.", without really thinking about it. I mean, this is love, real love here. Not violently smacking someone upside the head with "Thou shalt not.", but gently prodding that person with the love of the Father. And in that gentleness is power, more power than we can imagine. It's beyond words. You have to have felt it to know what I'm talking about.

Oh that I would be like Abigail, sent by God to meet His servants with His love.

"Behold, your maidservant is a maid to wash the feet of my lord's servants." v. 41

I know this is what God is fashioning me to be.

Inspiration

2009-06-03T10:49:00.000-05:00

The other day I was on a motorcycle ride with my dad and brother. After roaming the Killeen countryside for a while, we hopped on 35, which was a little crazy considering dad was only riding his little scooter. So there we were, cruising down 35 hovering between 55 and 60 mph, the speed limit being 70, when we came to a stretch of road they were repaving. Big trucks hauling asphalt were causing a bit of a traffic jam as they entered and exited said stretch of road so we were able to get a really good whiff of the melting asphalt. At the time, I couldn't for the life of me remember what it was that caused that wonderful smell and it was then I realized that over the past two years my brain has been slowly degenerating.

Thus, the inspiration for this blog.

Here I will record any thoughts I might have that are unrelated to my kids. Right now there aren't that many, but hopefully having a place to put them will inspire a more frequent flow and give my brain the exercise it needs.

And if anyone sees me talking about my kids on here, please, feel free to slap me upside the head.

Thank you and tonight.